One last time at the helm
Wednesday Jul 16th 3:05pm by Matt - E-mail Matt IM Matt
Just a couple of friends tubing

Well it's been about 2 months and you haven't heard anything from us. People have e-mailed asking if we're ever going to update the site again. And the answer is "no". TamUt.com has seen it's days of Matt and Brian, and those days are over. I meant to put this post up two months ago but have just been too lazy/busy to do it. Today at work I finally decided to do something productive (rather than sit and stare at my desk) and type this bad boy up. I'll go ahead and add a little content for one last time



Just a couple of friends tubing

Back at the beginning of June I enjoyed my last week of freedom before starting in the "real world" to the best of my abilities by going out 7 days in a row. During this streak I partied with Amberly and Jared (middle left and middle) for their 22nd birthdays. This was all so long ago that I don't really remember what all happened exciting during those nights but I do see I got one of my favorite type of pictures. Click here for the pics.

Well to end the streak off, the day before my first day of work me and a small group of friends (well just enough to fill up a short bus) ventured on down to the Comal river for a little tubing. Made it down the river three times in one day, which is a person record. Afterwards I grubbed out on some Rudy's and drove straight to San Antonio to get some sleep for work. Click here for the pics.

So now I'm out in the "real world". Been here for about a month and a half and I'm still trying to figure out why people make such a big deal out of it. I still party 3-4 nights a week until 2-3am (usually later) and still have tons of fun. Which San Antonio has been a hell of a lot more fun than I thought it was . . . oh I am all healed up from surgery. I got two cool x-rays though of my face. You can see the 2 titanium plates and 8 screws pretty well (Pic 1, Pic 2). Pretty cool huh? I tested out if I really would set of a metal detector or not at the airport the other day and thank god I don't. Probably would never be able to fly again if I did. (or get shot and arrested trying)

Oh yea, here's my story from my road trip back in May. Yea, it's long, but then again you're just here to waste time anyway.

So what's next for TamUt.com?

That's a damn good question. With both Brian and I retiring as webmasters there's a couple of things that could happen:

  1. We close the site down forever ending the legacy of our drunken exploits
  2. Put the site up for bid on e-bay and see which porn agency will pay the most for the domain
  3. Change the format of the site to advertise dates and times when we will be re-broadcasting Major League Baseball games with implied oral consent, not express written consent
  4. Strategically recruit two new webmasters to keep the TamUt.com tradition alive, and content continuous and unspoiled.

So I think there's only one real choice here (or maybe two if you count option 3). And so the recruit begins for new webmasters for the site. Needless to say that by "recruit" we mean "bring it up if we're drinking with our friends that are still in school or just wait for someone to turn in an application." Because Lord knows we aren't spending the time to actively find replacements. Took me two months just to write this post. And if you're wanting a copy of the application, there isn't one. Too lazy to make that too. If you want to apply, make your own application, fill it out, then e-mail it to us.

So long and good-bye TamUt.com, it's been a damn fine time. Some day I'll actually go through and read all the old posts from the past almost 3 years and reminisce about the "good ol' college days." Maybe I'll come back every couple of months to post as an alumni. Until then, go grab two girlies and a beer that's cold! I'll be in San Antonio if anyone needs me.

Can I graduate?!
Monday May 19th 10:57am by Matt - E-mail Matt IM Matt
6th street hottie

Well my last night as an undergrad has come and gone. I am now a UT Alum. But it doesn't quite feel any different. That probably has something to do with the fact that I only took 6 hours a semester for the past year. I think most people love their graduation day so much more because they just got done with intense finals for the last time. Whereas I had no finals at all and basically haven't had to work in school for over a year.

With all that said, that doesn't mean I didn't party my ass off graduation night. I think we have all been preparing for this past Saturday for a long time. I sure as hell know I had been. It all started out with the typical bar hopping, $54 bar tabs from buying a round of 19 shots and some Flaming Dr. Pepper's for my crew, and even a little booty snatching.

From there it was time to head to my place for the after party. There, my badass roommate had the whole apartment setup with mixers, liquor, and 2 kegs. Even I was surprised at how many people showed up for the party since it didn't start until 2:30. But by 3:00 there were about 100 people there just getting crazy. About that time I sat down with all my best friends from the past 2 years (you all know who you are) and looked at an awesome slideshow of pictures of all of us from the past two years. If you missed it you can check it out here. I even had a mini-show for the Wisconsin-ites. (yea I put Wisconsin 2003 instead of 2002, shut-up John). Sometime during the night I managed to pick up this guy's phone. Don't know how the hell that happened, I just happened to hear a phone ring in my pocket and didn't realize it wasn't mine until the person was asking who I was and how got the phone. At first I was like, "dude, you called me. I would hope you know who it is." Whatever the case, I was a nice person and gave him directions to come pick it up rather than making prank calls to China. Other highlights of the night include one awesome button (it came in a card that said, "now that you've graduated, here's something you can wear.", thanks Am!), horrible photography by someone (I wish I knew who took that pic so I can slap them upside the head), and I actually got to meet Kelly, the girl who keeps the message board active (except that past 2 weeks).

Click here to see all the pictures.


Oh yea, I'm off for a road trip for two weeks. Have fun ya'll!

Last night with 'The Norwegians'
Thursday May 15th 1:09am by Matt - E-mail Matt IM Matt
'The Norwegians'

Over the past two semesters these three guys have established quite a name for themselves here in Austin. Known by most as "The Norwegains" or "The foreign boys", Haakon, Magnus, and Anders took Austin (and the US) by storm with almost nightly adventures downtown and to parties. But the fun didn't stop there. They also made trips to all kinds of other places such as New Orleans and Cancun.

But last night their days of college fun the US came to an end as they got deported today. No just kidding, but they did fly back home to Norway today. And I just wanted to put up a little tribute to them and say that it's been a lot of fun partying with ya'll the past 9 months. Some day I am definitely going to have to come visit you guys in Norway or Edinburgh. And if you ever head back to the states then send me an e-mail and we'll have to meet up wherever you go. Actually, send me an e-mail when you read this so I'll have all your e-mail addresses. Keep in touch!


Kid in a candy store

So last night while we're at the bar I go upstairs to get another round and discover there's no bartender at the bar. Then I see that there are only two people in the whole upstairs. I talk these two girls and it turns out that they are also just waiting on the bartender so they can close their tab but they haven't seen anyone for a while. I think it's obvious what we had to do here. So we all jump behind the bar and start just pouring drink after shot and drink of just whatever the hell we wanted. We felt like kids in a candy store with free reign to any top shelf liquor or drink we desired. But of course all good things have to come to an end. After about 20 minutes of indulgence the bartender finally walks back upstairs to see the three of us behind the bar making drinks. He yells at us to get out from behind the bar. We explain we waiting forever to close our tabs but no one was there. Luckily the bartender was drunk and cool with it. He says to me, "well as long as you made these drinks you better drink them, down all your drinks right now." So we do that and he closes our tabs (mine was $6) and tells us to tip him well. So I tip him $7 and went along my marry way. I was after that I was so damn excited I could barely control myself (but that might also have been from the 3 Red Bulls I drank too). We went home and after partied in the parking lot of my apartment complex since my roommate was sleeping and didn't want to be woken up (though I think I did anyway). During that time we engaged in many activities including wrestling in the grass and shooting bottle rockets at frogs and each other. (yea, we're mature) Long story short, it was damn good night that lasted until about 6 in the morning.

Also, I still haven't found anyone to sublease my room for the summer. So hopefully one of ya'll out there need a place for cheap in Austin for the summer. If so, send me an e-mail. I really don't want to pay two rents all summer.

Need some entertainment? Go read Timon's random thoughts. (though the site will probably only be live for another month since that's UT webspace and he's graduating)


My luck continues

As you should all know by know, I have the best luck of any man alive. And by 'best' I mean 'it couldn't possibly get any worse'. At least that's what I think, but with each day I am proved wrong time and time again.

So my car was in the shop for 10 days getting a new transmission put in it. I did still have warranty coverage on the thing so all I had to pay was a $50 deductable and I get a rental car too. Doesn't sound too shabby right? Well turns out my warranty onle covered the rental for 5 days and I had to pay the $150 for the other 5 days. Ok, that's cool b/c I had fun tearing up the rental. But then less than 24 hours after I get my car back I drive to Dallas for a doctors appointment and my clutch goes out while I'm there. So I limp it back home to Arlington. I decided I'll just drive back to Austin with no clutch and take it back to where they put in the transmission because obviously they fucked something up putting my tranny in. Well I try to drive it again and it starts to make a horrible clanking sound. So I don't get to go back to austin last night. I wake up this morning and have it towed to a dealership and sit around for a few hours waiting until they finally discover that my clutch cable had been "improperly installed". But I still have to front the $36 because it was the other dealership's fault and I need to take it up them.

So now I have a car and I'm gonna drive back to Austin to bitch the original dealership out and get $36 of reimbursment. On top of that, the clutch still isn't right. It doesn't disengage until the very bottom with the petal is actually touching the floor. Where as the top 6" have no pressure at all.

All this shit I have to deal with and I graduate tomorrow morning at 9am. What's next? That's all I got to say, what's next?

Version 2 is Here
Sunday May 11th 1:43am by Brian - E-mail Brian IM Brian

As many of you, like 7 or so, may have known, Fantasy Drinkin' Version 2 has been in the works since the first version debuted whenever it did. What does V2 bring to the plate? It brings more drinks, a choice of the avatars above, blackjack, and fabulous prizes. What fabulous prizes you might ask? Well, maybe some sort of name recognition on the homepage. That's why we ask for your e-mail address when you register, so we can notify you of winning...and sell them to porn mailing lists for a premium price of a peso a name. That money will help me to buy the equivalent of a 10 ticket prize at the local Putt-Putt Golf and Games. Hello cheap plastic hopping frog action.

V2 play starts at midnight tonight. If you have already registered, your name has been moved over to the new version. If you have not registered, you can go ahead and register but no logins until after midnight. Also, the rules link really does have actual info in there, it isn't just my personal political manifesto as some of you were led to believe.

Fantasy Drinkin' Link

Weekend Entertainment
Thursday May 8th 1:56pm by Matt - E-mail Matt IM Matt
Downtown Crew

So this weekend has already began and I'm just putting up the pictures from last weekend. What excuse can I use for being late ... I think I'll pull the "I was in the hospital" excuse this time. Whatever, on to the topic.

Seeing how UT finals started yesterday, it is our duty as TamUt webmasters to give you more than enough material to read and things to do to keep yourself distracted from studying as long as possible. I'll start with some stories of the weekend and then come up with some more ideas.

Last Friday my hottie neighbors (file photo) threw a spur of the moment party. And for deciding one day before to have a party they rallied up quite a crowd. Seeing how it was right next door I stayed there to party all night. The cops showed up the first time and Ashley kicked most everyone out (which I still don't think was necessary) but that just meant more beer for all of us. Still you can always wait until the cops come the second time before you actually have to kick people out. Whatever. Also, Chris found out that if you wear fairy wings then you can sly your way into getting kisses from hot girls. Note to self: keep pair of wings hidden until end of the night for rewards later. Click here to see all the pictures from the night.

Well the next day a couple of friends threw down and had a crawfish boil. Now I'll be honest and say that I've never been to a crawfish boil before but it was quite a good time. I learned that there are many things to do and games to play with crawfish. Such as . . .

And of course a crawfish boil wouldn't be complete without some drinking races and drunken cheering. Click here to see all the pictures from the boil.

Well the drinking went straight into the night starting off with a beautiful rental truck burn out. I could just stop right there and my night would be made. But apparently the burn out made quite a bit of noise which caused these girls to come out and see what all the hiatus was about. Coincidentally, they happened to be having a bachelorette party for one of the girls. My roommate and I were then forced by them to go into their apartment with our shirts off and get dirty. It was horrible. Afterwards there was some random getting ready to go out drinking and off to 6th. From there it was a normal night on the town. Highlights include when I ordered 3 Long Islands for everyone and then ran off with all 3 and drank them in 5 minutes and me breaking the button on my digital camera (which is only 5 days old). Apparently after downtown people came back to my place and after partied. I was there partying as well but I don't remember that really. I do remember at about 4:30 being at another random party with some friends. Don't know how or why we were there, but I didn't end up crashing out until about 5:30 or so. A pretty long night, and yet another problem with the digital camera. Don't know what I'll do about it this time.

So what is there to distract you? How about Drunken Story #15 from Australia. Go read it and be inspired to type of a drunken story of your own. Then e-mail it to us to post.

Other things to do in lieu of study: HotorNot.com, read or submit a rant, start in internet based company called "Compu-global-hyper-mega-net " and get 'bought out' by Bill Gates before your company can get off its feet and start competition, play Fantasy Drinking v1 (v2 is just about complete), or just sit on your back porch and enjoy the weather.

I'm sure Brian can jump in with a few more things to add to his infamous list of "Things to do in Lieu of Studying". Until then, just procrastinate.

Oh yea

Apartment for sublease

I'm moving to San Antonio in a couple of weeks so if you need a place to live for the summer I got a nice Melrose apartment that has been well broken in for parties and good times. E-mail or IM me for details.

One eventful life
Friday May 2nd 5:24am by Matt - E-mail Matt IM Matt

At first there was gold, then the much rapped about platinum, but what I bring you today is the new standard of the pimped out minerals, titanium. And what better than to sport a little of that screwed to your left cheekbone?

Ok, maybe I've eaten too many Cadbury eggs today. But one thing is for sure, I'm getting two titanium plates in my left cheek tomorrow when I go in for surgery. People keep asking what happened so I'll reiterate it by sending you a link to the original story, go read it. People also ask what got hurt. So here are the details according to the OFMS. Apparently this little "car accident" of mine managed to give me a Tripod fracture. That is a fracture of the Zygoma (cheekbone), Zygomatic Arch (essentially the temple), and the frontal bone (just above your eye). I also caused an orbital blowout fracture. The orbital wall is what separates your eye from the Maxillary sinus and also holds the eye in place. Don't know the bones of the face, go freshen up. The orbital blowout fracture is the main cause of my surgery. The orbital wall is very thin compared to the Zygoma and fractures much easier. As a result, this fracture actually has a hole in it as well. So the surgery is going to pull the cheekbone back into place (itís about 2-3mm depressed), screw a titanium plate along the lower Zygoma and Orbital wall to hold them in place and also put a piece of mesh something or other over the hole until it heals. Sounds like fun right? Of course it does. Also what is pretty neat is that if I look to the right I look like the devil. That's because the entire left side of my eye is bright blood red. I'll spare you all the picture so I don't scare you.

Update 11:15am: Well that would just be too normal for my surgery to be held on time. So what happens today? There's a power outage at the Baylor Medical Hospital in Dallas and all surgeries have been pushed back. I now go under the knife Monday. Well I guess that's cool b/c it means I get to go back to Austin and party there this weekend. But sucks because I'm tired as hell because I got no sleep last night in my plan to be ultra tired and sleep through the whole visit. Well, see ya'll in Austin tonight.


News Flash!

Fire Hazard

Well just call me FIREMAN Spot. I just saved my house from burning down! I shit you not! Ok, so I'm sitting here at home just killing time at 3:45am writing this post about my surgery when I hear a load POP. I live in a zoo of animals back at home so I'm used to noises in the middle of the night. But that's not to say that it didn't spook me a little but I get right back to reading about Tripod fractures on the internet. Well I here the POP again . . . then again. This is over about maybe a 90 second period. So I hear it again and I think, "What the hell is this cat doing? I'm going to go kick it or something because that noise is pissing me off." So I walk out into the hall and I see the one cat that is running loose in my house standing there in the hall. I look all around it for what it was hitting to make the noise. Then I look down the hall into my entry hall and see that there's a 3-foot fire going behind the fish tank! I run up to it and see that it's the surge protector behind the fish tank that is popping and burning. For a split second I think of how to put the fire out. I thought I remembered that you shouldn't put water on an electrical fire, but there no other way that I could think of to put it out. So I dash to the kitchen where there just happen to be a 2 liter jug of water just sitting on the counter. I take it back to the fire and douse it. It goes out after a second sling of water but I still here popping. So I've got to get this thing unplugged, but I sure as hell don't want to touch it directly. I ran to the kitchen and grabbed a towel and pulled the plug (so maybe a towel wasn't the best utensil but I was in a hurry). The popping/sparking stopped and the panic was over. I turned on the lights (everything was off before) to reveal that the top 4 feet of the 10 foot ceiling was a black cloud of smoke. Along the walls of that 10-foot ceiling was a smoke detector that still hadn't gone off.

After that I woke my mom and we cleared out the smoke and investigated the fire. It appears from first glance that there had been a history of minerals (and perhaps water) dripping from the water pump from the fish tank directly on to where the fire started on the surge protector. Though no water was present along the suspected trace. Or it could have been all the fur stuck back behind there. We'll have a friend who is a fire chief investigate further. But imagine if I didn't come up here for surgery this weekend. My mom and sister were asleep and the fire detector didn't go off until about 5 minutes after we started clearing out the smoke (don't know why it decided to go off then). Half the house would have been on fire before they woke up. Just crazy! As if I don't have enough craziness already!

No need to spend the wheel of morality on this post: "It's a damn good thing I got drunk and rolled off that car or else I wouldn't have been up here tonight for surgery and to save my house from burning down." Also: "Make sure your smoke detector works well." What a life I live.

Spot
Wednesday Apr 30th 7:50pm by Matt - E-mail Matt IM Matt
Beer and Fruit

Just give me a tail and call me 'spot' cause that's what I think of whenever I see a picture of myself right now. But does that stop me from going out? Heck no. Last Thursday I headed down to my future home of San Antonio for "Fiesta!", rather NIOSA to be more accurate. NIOSA is a big party they have in the afternoon until 10pm with themes of all the different cultures around the world. It was packed like sardines but they had plenty of beer on tap. While there we ate fruit with our beer (above), cracked a few eggs (yea Brenda, I know you look drunk, sorry), and did plenty of salsa dancing. We then ventured on to some club called fuel. Let me tell you that this is one ghetto club. We didn't stay there long before leaving to Babcock Bar, which was more of a local bar. We could dig the crowd so we stayed there the rest of the night and got our drinkin' on. All in all, it was a good first party experience for me in San Antonio. The girls showed me a damn good time. Click here to see all the pics from the night.

Well the very next evening I was off to a little change of pace and went to the 1st Annual Orange and White Senior Ball with my friend Melody. There were about 400 people there, which was more than I was expecting. It was fun b/c it was like a prom all over again except we had a bar (though not a full bar, very unimpressive). I sent them an e-mail explaining that next time they need a full bar. They also had a cool ice statue of the UT tower. Though they aren't anything crazy, here are the pictures from the evening.

The next night I went out for another change of pace for me and did some party hoppin'. I think there were more parties that Saturday night than I have ever heard seen. Cool with me, don't gotta pay for anything for the night. For some reason I only took one picture, but it's a good one of me and the boys that worked all summer in Wisconsin. It was great to see a bunch of amateurs try to throw a party but then get it busted at 11:45 and freak out. Good stuff.

So let's spin the wheel of morality and see what the moral of the post is: "I didn't get drunk the whole weekend and still had a good time." So to all you doubters of my sobriety out there, fuck off.

Old Posts

Where are all the old posts?

We put the old posts on the ironically named "Old Posts" page. Go there to check out all the good stuff that we posted before this week.


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